Confidence - Within and Without

Sometimes our own minds are our worst enemies. They makes us think things that are just not true. Stuff like we aren't sexy, beautiful, or feminine enough. That we are too fat, too short, too ugly. That we are not smart, good or useful.

Our minds and the media will screw our self esteem and heads many times over. And all of the above statements are total bullshit. I have the same self doubts on things just as many of you do. I do feel that I am not feminine enough a lot of times for my Padrone. I do wish at times that I were sexier, or at least knew how to be sexier, dress sexier, without all of my body parts hanging out; act sexier, but not in a slutty way. Though, there is a time and place for that. I like short hair. It's easier to maintain. But on me, I think long hair is better and I have been told that it does by several people, strangers and friends alike. Am I confident enough to pull off the short and the long? Yes.

I am confident in how I look with my hair and I am pretty confident with my body. Do I want to loose more weight? Of course. What woman that isn't thin, do you know that would not like to loose even 5 pounds? But I refuse to do anything stupid, like some weird diet or exercise until I drop. And I definitely refuse to give up foods I like to eat. Life is short and about enjoyment. We should eat, laugh and love as much as we can. All in moderation, obviously, but you get my drift. Now, I have cut out a lot of sugar for health reasons, but am addicted to Italian pastries and chocolate. I have seen many changes, in not only my body, but my health, emotional and mental well being since moving almost four years ago.

There are little things in daily life that I do, and am starting to do, to make changes or improvements to me. But these are not things that anyone or my Padrone has said 'I want you to...'. These are change I have chosen to make, and luckily have been well supported by my very loving fiance, Marco. One change is that I wear makeup a lot more than I have in the past 10 years. It takes no time to put on and I don't do all the products to look like a clown. A very light color, little lipstick and eyeliner and bam! Makes a big difference and I know that I look good. See, what I am finding is that when I absolutely think and know within myself that I look good, it makes me feel good and no matter what anyone thinks or says, I know that I love me as I am and as I look.

Another change that I've made is by wearing a dress every more often. They are not as practical as pants, but they do make me feel and look a lot great and are a huge confidence booster. I have started wearing clothes that are more form fitting, versus wearing ones that are very baggy. I got into the whole trap, that if you are a big girl, you need to hide all your body parts. That is simply not true. Women of all shapes and sizes can look beautiful and classy, or sexy dressed in form fitting clothes. They will not only give you a confidence boost, but also might get you some nice looks from others, that will in turn help boost your confidence. I am not saying to go out with your boobies or butts hanging out. Not at all! Just sexy, but classy. I actually don't show much skin, because, for one its winter. And two, I don't like to. Why show cleavage when I can wear a form fitting shirt that shows my shape without actually giving away the goods?

I hope you find the confidence that I have. With confidence in yourself and your abilities, you have no limits to what you can accomplish! Start now by implementing little things that will help you see yourself in a more positive light. Stay Comfortable and true to yourself, but learn that change is good and many times, can bring about amazing results.